• Nose Noise
• Feeling Feet
• Superficially Artificial
• Expected Surprise
• Monkey Leisure
• Passing Aggressive
• Hybrid Carport
• Crazy Auger
• Exceptionally Enduring External Expression
• Hobo Fries
• Cat Invasion
• Cheese Wizard

I have been in a (blog related?) existential conundrum for the last few weeks brought on by the election and financial crisis and amplified by some reading/viewing/thinking I have been doing. I never intended this blog to be (or become) a personal historical zeitgeist. I have been troubled since beginning my blog that it had no editorial vision, as my twitter feed clearly does.

The trouble is that I currently am not, and do not wish to become, a pundit, commentator, or advisor on political, economic, or similar issues. I do not have the degree of education (formal or informal) on any of these subjects that I feel is necessary to be a responsible writer on the subjects. This isn’t to say I have no thoughts on the subjects as they stand, or that it takes a degree and a “mainstream” opinion to make a valuable contribution, far from it.

The question I pose to myself every time I attempt and fail to write a coherent post about a topic like the presidential “debates” is “What the hell am I doing?” As a cynic, it goes without saying that I doubt my tiny, paranoid rants will be effective in making a difference. I’m not writing for kudos or to change the world, I’m writing because I’m a frustrated, overly-critical cynic and if I don’t vent that steam somewhere: kaboom. If I can make a difference in the thinking of a few readers, great.

But that still leaves my question unanswered. I could write this all in a obscenely titled text file found only after my death as my children sort through my affects trying to make sense of my life, but that isn’t what i am doing. So why?

I don’t have an answer to that question yet. I am a little closer to an answer to the how/what questions for this blog, which is the opposite of how I like to work, but at least it’s something.

Aside: For those of you interested in a post on the “debate,” it is coming.

Other than my recent tirade I have been unable to post here as frequently as I would like. It’s not for lack of anger or indignation. Rather I have been using my writing powers for good (for a change?) over at the NoiseTrade blog.

Knowing is half the battle.

…try and buy a house.

Today I sold my faithful Mac Pro, known internally as “quadruple_threat,” via craigslist. It’s been a great machine, but I’ve been using it so little since moving to Nashvegas that I can’t justify keeping it around anymore just because it would it would be great for something that I never use it for.

So now, apart from The Collection and the media credenza, I’m officially laptop only.

Exhaustive list:

That is all.

Here’s a little known fact about me that you’re all dying to hear.

When seated in public places (coffeeshops, restaurants, offices, etc.) I have to sit with my back immediately to a wall. If I’m working (on a computer) I also have to be positioned so people can’t see my screen.

Clearly I’m not a spy, but if I can’t sit as described I become very self-conscious and a piece of my brain remains focused on my surrounds and keeping my radar up. Consequently I can’t focus, I get all twitchy and irritable, and I’ll want to leave as soon as possible. So I guess if you want my undivided attention, sit me at a wall.

Because Flo took a M-B test via Alice, she made me post my well-established M-B/Keirsey results:

INTJ - The Rational Mastermind

Some excerpts from INTJ profiles:

To outsiders, INTJs may appear to project an aura of “definiteness”, of self-confidence. Sometimes mistaken for simple arrogance by the less decisive, this confidence is very specific rather than general in nature; its grows out of the specialized knowledge systems that INTJs start building at an early age.

INTJs are known as the “Systems Builders,” perhaps in part because they possess the unusual trait combination of imagination and reliability. Anyone considered to be “slacking,” including superiors, will lose their respect — and will generally be made aware of this. On the other hand, they do tend to be scrupulous and even-handed about recognizing the individual contributions that have gone into a project, and have a gift for seizing opportunities which others might not even notice.

Contingency planning and entailment organizing reaches its highest level of development in the Rational Mastermind. It is not an informative activity for them, but a directive one in which the planner tells others what to do and the order in which to do it. As the organizing capabilities the Mastermind increases so does his or her inclination to take charge of whatever is going on.

While they are capable of caring deeply for others (usually a select few), and are willing to spend a great deal of time and effort on a relationship, the knowledge and self-confidence that make them so successful in other areas can suddenly abandon or mislead them in interpersonal situations.

And some “rules” for dealing with INTJs:

• Be willing to back up your statements with facts or sound reasoning.
• Don’t expect an INTJ to respect you or your opinion without reason: respect must be earned.
• Expect debate. INTJs like to tear ideas apart to discern their worthiness. They will argue a point they don’t support just for the sake of argument.
• Do not confuse the strength of your conviction with that of your argument. INTJs do not need to believe in a position to argue it well.
• Do not be surprised when you encounter sarcasm.
• The ultimate insult to an idea is to ignore it. This means it isn’t even interesting enough to deconstruct.
• INTJs believe in workable solutions. They are extremely open-minded to possibilities, but they will quickly discard any idea that is unfeasible.
• INTJs do not care about how you view them. They already know that they are arrogant bastards with a morbid sense of humor. Restating the obvious is a waste of time.

And, last but not least, a few alleged and actual INTJs:

• Augustus Caesar
• Mr. Burns
• Ayn Rand
• Niels Bohr
• George Lucas
• Colin Powell
• C.S. Lewis
• Professor Moriarty
• Gandalf the Grey

tiny planets, two hydrogen/one oxygen at a time
counted easily as stars
forge in this one
a chasm that leads eventually to one grander

tiny planets, two sorrow/one suffering at a time
counted slowly as stars
forge in every one
a chasm that leads to one greater

between stone or hearts or both
between the me i know i am and wish i was
between the you that you are and the you that i remember
between the love of what was and the pain of what will be

or maybe they are all the same chasm
are all one
themselves and their like
across three days of darkness to the moon
and the further silence to the great planets
and phobos and deimos
cutting a chasm of all hearts
across the freezing hot black between
my world and yours

We will all be in Cali for the next week, so it’s travellin’ time again.  Some of you will see us, other, no doubt, will not be so, uh, fortunate.

I have downloaded Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking by Malcolm Gladwell in audiobook format. I will be listening to it on the plane (when not trying to placate bored, frustrated children) and in the car (when not trying to placate bored, frustrated children). I’m a little behind on this; it does sound interesting in a “well, duh” kind of way. Hoping to take away some concepts that can be applied to other areas of my life (photography, writing, usability, etc.).